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南玉

罗素:对爱的渴望,对知识的寻求,对人类苦难的无法承受的同情,这种激情支配我的一生

 
 
 

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Authority  

2007-11-28 05:16:13|  分类: 社会·杂谈 |  标签: |举报 |字号 订阅

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Authority

Thinking of my childhood my father always keep hard face at all time, as if the smiling face will take his authority away. In fact it does work, I got scared to talk with him, even tried to avoid meeting him, which caused lots of trouble to our communication. However this barrier we suffered from both we couldn’t cope with. Thus I thought my father he didn’t like me, no matter how much effect I made still I could’t make him happy. At last I decided to give up, just ignored his mood, temper.

When time goes by, I realised my father just like thousands of father he do love me, but to build up his authority in our family, he has to make hard face to keep his position. Therefore the dark from the past has gone gradually, but the shadow couldn’t removed from my memory. As child I need to be spoiled, to be special, and to be wanted by my family, not just to be trained as products of expectation.

As big girl, an adult, I further understand through the life of experience, of what the authority can be. I could quite rather be spoiled in my father’s arm, crying on his shoulder to get my childhood back, than being mouse to scared of the cat. Actually love you paid, in turn the love will be given.

Speaking of authority, it brings me back to daily life.  One of my colleagues who really impress me, that time I was new in my workplace to work with her, as new staff I haven’t get through the routine work, she never told me to follow her way, just work on her own, as for me I have one eyes to look, to think with my mind, so that to be familiar with everything as quick as I can. I appreciated her respect not being bossy, even sometime I may be wrong she would not blame just correct wordlessly. One day for some reason I got right hip pain, being difficult to sit, she just went to made hot sandy bag, asked me to keep warm, which could be beneficial for my pain.

I appreciated her consideration not only for her kind, genuine character but also give me a valuable lesson to my life.  To meet people needs which in fact build up invisible authority.  Do whatever you can do without any expectation for return,  however  she will try to take her help away from your mental pressure, in order you can  be easy to accept the  timely hand she offer . Afterwards I observed she is real angel to all people around  her.  The truth, the reality is, people indeed get scared of her, get scared of that she might not be happy, or being upset for some reason, in turn she indeed get wordless authority.

The authority she build up just based on her concerns, to help whatever she can do, to meet people’s needs  whatever she could do.  Meanwhile, thinking of the relationship with love, it is not demandable, asked and begged, it comes from the love you have given. One gesture, one sooth word, one encouraging smile would cause love reward.

All in all, from the authority to the love, we should bear in mind, authority is not to show your authority to maintain your position, love is not demanding to be given, just put your feet on other position to think what they will need, and you may be surprised for the reward.



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